Self love is one of the most important wholesome principles. If we don’t love ourselves, how do we expect others to?
When we’re our best versions of ourselves, loving ourselves fully, we can fully love others to without reservation. We need to love and believe in ourselves
When our self love levels are overflowing, we can spread our love further than if we feel depleted. Gabrielle Burnstein, who wrote the book May Cause Miracles, says “When we fulfill our function, which is to truly love ourselves and share love with others, then true happiness sets in.”
Women, in particular, are known to rush into sharing their love with other people while looking past themselves.
Love, Light, Soul has a beautiful quote on loving yourself first:
“Not everyone is always going to love us, think we are great, funny, smart or beautiful but as long as we hold that opinion of ourselves then everything will always work out for our highest good. Our light will keep shining brighter which can only ever allow others to shine brighter too.”
When we love ourselves fully, we can share that love with others. We need to make sure our own emotional banks are topped up then we can fully offer our gifts to the world.
Easy steps for self-loving:
Forgiveness & Acceptance
Forgive everyone so that you’re free to prosper here and now. We only have one life and if we continue to drag around baggage, we’re blocking good things to come into our lives.
Forgive yourself. Forgive all your past wrongdoings and stupid mistakes. Forgive yourself for the things you didn’t do. Forgive your parents. They did the best they could with what information and resources they had at the time. Forgive your exes. Learn your lessons, let go of the past and past attachments. Remember the good times fondly, learn from the not so good, then fully live your life in this moment and the next.
Yes, no doubt you’ve made mistakes. Make peace with them. Forgive what has passed. Accept who you are.
If you feel intense emotions, sit with them. Explore why they’re there. Figure out what they’re trying to teach you and move on.
Honour who you are right now.
Know and trust that what you’re doing your best. Become more aware of how you speak to yourself, forgive yourself when you’re not acting from a place of love and adjust.
Appreciate the amazing body you’re in, your able mind and your connections in the world. Remind yourself about your beautiful qualities. Be proud of what you have and what you can do. Try writing down five things that you’re grateful for.
Find a self loving ritual or activity you know will make you feel good. Find satisfaction from within rather than from outside sources.
Find what it is that will make your heart feel fulfilled when you’re alone, and do more of that.
Treat yourself to a bath. Take yourself to the movies. Dance wildly to your favourite song. Give yourself the chance to rest and restore your body and mind. Spend quality time with yourself doing what you love.
Avoid finding self-worth or satisfaction from external sources such as alcohol or food or shopping. These short term external fixes will only numb your emotions or create a false sense of accomplishment.
And most importantly, be kind to yourself.
- How do show that you love yourself?
- Do you actively forgive yourself for mistakes and past wrong doings? Or do you hold grudges?
- What do you love doing alone?